Choice or Chance?

The path you chose will lead you to where you’re at.  Free agency is the most special and powerful gift that we have been given in our existence.  It’s not like flipping a coin for every decision that needs to be made.  We weren’t put here upon this earth by chance or to have everything happen by chance but we were given the opportunity to make choices with our free agency.  We don’t make decisions based upon the heads or tails of a coin or life wouldn’t have very much meaning.  We ultimately have the power to choose the path we make and where it will eventually lead us.  Every choice leads to an eternal destination.

The idea of chance can surely be a very interesting study of imagination.  Just think back to a very difficult choice you made in the past and what if you based the consequence of that choice on the flipping of a coin.  Where would you be now and would things be any different?  Would your whole life be altered because you chose heads or tails?  I think it’s hard to say but it sure makes for pretty deep contemplation and conversation.  Don’t you think?

New Cordell & Sara Blog

While redecorating the look and feel of my personal blog I decided to start another new blog that is dedicated to just Sara and I.  Please take a look by locating and clicking the link posted under the “Family” section on the right hand side of this blog.  You may have to scroll down a little.  Please feel free to tell us what you think. You are invited and encouraged to leave comments, please.  Thank you.

Past, Present and Future: A New Beginning

There’s something new on the horizon and I thought it was time for a little remodeling and simplification.  Leaving one set of footprints behind, a new path is waiting before me.  I will strike out on a new adventure in two weeks but I will have a new traveling companion by my side.  I love her dearly and eternally and I am hopeful of the future.  She brings me great and needed inspiration during these turbulent times the world is currently facing.  I hold her close in every thought and every action and will respect and protect her to the best of my ability.  She is most precious above all other things in this mortal existence and I want her to know how beautiful and special she is.  I love her now, I loved her then, and I will love her always.

Just “Walk On”

Things have been very rough and depressing lately and I feel like there is nowhere to turn and that the horizon is so very distant.  I know my faith is still young and weak and that there is so much to learn and grow from. Patience, a quality I use to possess, hasn’t been with me in recent years and I struggle at being humble and submissive. Some days I just want to stop along the path and find a nice shady tree and pull up a blanket of grass and take a really long nap.  Life is hard and it’s not easy for me to accept but today I would like to share the lyrics to a song that seem to mean so much to me when I came across them for the millionth time and they actually hit me like a rock to the head.  Here are the lyrics to “Walk On” by U2:

And love is not the easy thing
The only baggage you can bring…
And love is not the easy thing….
The only baggage you can bring
Is all that you can’t leave behind

And if the darkness is to keep us apart
And if the daylight feels like it’s a long way off
And if your glass heart should crack
And for a second you turn back
Oh no, be strong

Walk on, walk on
What you got they can’t steal it
No they can’t even feel it
Walk on, walk on…
Stay safe tonight

You’re packing a suitcase for a place none of us has been
A place that has to be believed to be seen
You could have flown away
A singing bird in an open cage
Who will only fly, only fly for freedom

Walk on, walk on
What you’ve got they can’t deny it
Can’t sell it, can’t buy it
Walk on, walk on
Stay safe tonight

And I know it aches
And your heart it breaks
And you can only take so much
Walk on, walk on

Home, hard to know what it is if you’ve never had one
Home, I can’t say where it is but I know I’m going home
That’s where the hurt is

I know it aches
How your heart it breaks
And you can only take so much
Walk on, walk on

Leave it behind
You’ve got to leave it behind
All that you fashion
All that you make
All that you build
All that you break
All that you measure
All that you steal
All this you can leave behind
All that you reason
All that you sense
All that you speak
All you dress up
All that you scheme.

What a Crazy Life

I didn’t realize how crazy busy life can get sometimes until the past few weeks.  With a full-time job, wedding planning and preparation, and having a temporary second job, life can get really hectic and tiring.  I feel like I’m about to pass out.  There is almost no time for myself and I’m not trying to be selfish but we all need some time to our selves so that we can revitalize our body and minds from the strains of everyday life.  I absolutely have had no time to read or write in the past few weeks and last week was the first week I haven’t posted anything on my blog.  My goal at the beginning of the year was to write in my journal or on my blog at least once a week and last week I was not able to.  I am not disappointed in myself and I will just move forward and learn to budget some time for myself a little better in the future.

This Morning: Spring Fever

Outside, beyond the window, as the day slowly warms, I have watched the snow melt in the backyard.  Falling from the branches of the cherry tree and being absorbed into the welcoming soil.  Gravity pulls the lifeblood ever downward waiting and preparing for the birth of spring.  Little shoots of life have already pushed upward through the dampened earth seeking the rays of sunshine.  The cycle of life begins again in this beautiful season.  My heart aches and I know what it desires but patience must overcome restlessness and the fever of freedom.

Blanket of Snow

A purity and innocence blanket the trampled and tired earth once again.  And like no other morning the light shines with intense brilliance beyond capturing.  You have to witness it to believe it but not today because your heart is overflowing with unseen knowledge.  Somehow you sense the truthfulness and you remain at peace while contemplating the love that burns deep inside of you.  Your thoughts turn towards the heavens and the world is left somewhere far behind.

Restless Butterfly

It’s springtime again and the poetry has somehow escaped my thoughts in the warming air.  They say it won’t last very long and the coldness will return with another possible blanket of white.  My heart grows restless for the continuing warmth to wash over me and for the freedom of landscapes to traverse.  I have a romance with the impossible but I enjoy the dreams and the anticipation of finding liberty of soul.  I’m comfortable with life and my love overflows but my heart echoes from yesterday and nature is pulling at my strings.  It’s time to pack up the backpack and journey the adventure once again but at the same time it’s time to settle in if only for a little bit.  She will understand the fluttering butterfly wanting to dry its wings from being cocooned.

Magnificent: The Last 10 Days of Life

It’s been quite a ride during the past 10 days, to say the least.  I got engaged to the most beautiful girl in the whole world and she is the joy and love of my life.  We have been working on wedding plans but our work schedules seem to be giving us a challenge on spending time together.  We did get registered at two different stores already and we realized how much we really don’t know about things when it comes to making a home together.  We are just a simple couple and just want to be happy.

I spent most of the day on Thursday getting in touch with many friends so that I may have addresses to send wedding reception invites to.  I realize many of my friends and family may not be able to attend, I was just happy to do a little catching up with them.  I still find it amazing how so many people have touched and changed my life over the course of my life.  Some acquaintances I have met on the journey still bring tears to my eyes even though we may only keep in touch on rare occasion.  I love each and every person that I have ever made friends with and I want them to know that.  You all mean so very much to me.

Sara has been stressing over many details of the wedding and the days leading up to it.  We still have a little over 100 days before our big day and I feel inadequate at times to comfort her when she is feeling down.  I find it a little ironic and humorous that she and I have completely switched personalities in the past couple months.  She has always been the cheerful, strong spirit that has lifted me up many times during our long relationship.  Lately she has been a little overwhelmed with fear and doubt and I have been the one with the positive outlook on the future. 

Those of you that have read some of my previous blogs know that I have struggled throughout the past with despair in my own life.  I have come to a deeper understanding of God and myself in the past couple of months.  I have grown stronger in faith and hope even though it is really being put to the test lately.  Now I have to be the strength in the relationship between Sara and me.  As I have recently discussed with her, life and marriage are something that we can learn and grow from together.  This is no longer just an individual journey but an eternal companionship.  I love her dearly and I will do my best to support her when she feels she can’t go on.

Finishing off these crazy few days I was blown away the other day when I found out that I could preview the new U2 album: No Line on the Horizon, on the internet before its March 3 release date.  I listened to it and was instantly amazed by the beauty of every song.  Every song is truly “magnificent,” which ironically is the title of my favorite song, so far, on the new album.  Definitely, in my opinion, this album is U2’s greatest work yet.  I can’t wait to drag Sara along to a concert on their upcoming tour and have her experience the energy and best live performance that can ever be found on stage.  The music of U2 has influenced my life in more ways than one and has spanned my entire life.  Their music is dear to my heart.

 I have faith that everything in the future will be alright as long as we humble ourselves and put our trust in the Lord.  We live during a very difficult timeline and we must continue to have hope and suppress the feelings of despair that continues to bombard us daily.  Love life because life is wonderful and magnificent!

My Fiancée’s Diamond Engagement Ring