The allure is remorseful and the appetite, the addiction lingers and flirts with damning consequence. I’m falling into nothing and I sit and wonder, wander, waiting for the morrow to come and rescue me from sorrow, this confusion. The angst is overwhelming and heavy with worthlessness. I’m trying to forget the story but unfortunately it’s mine to share with delicate introspect. The chemical thirst, the rush of devilish lust is my crime and the shackles have rusted away my soul slowly and into a state of surreal numbness. I have an empire of dirt to dig through beneath cloudy skies and even though I know the light is constant I am blind but I can still see the serpent’s eyes. Please forgive me but please forget me as I am lost and have sacrificed myself to solitude.

© 2008 Cordell J. Larkin

Parched by a harsh August sun and with all the dust that goes along, I am hungry and thirsty, desperate for inspiration and I’m seeking restitution for the miles of drought and desolation. I’ve lost myself again, amidst the sand, and the most important part of me is missing and aching for that line on the horizon where everything comes together into a single point of perspective. Where have all the trees gone that shaded me from this myriad of misfortune? This mirage has trapped me in a forever tomorrow, inside this secret prison of mine, constructed from yesterdays and the wall isn’t getting any shorter. I’m losing this battle to an addiction and I can’t seem to pierce the dragon’s heart. Don’t forgive me but please take me home.

© 2008 Cordell J. Larkin

I’ll be taking to the road soon with nothing but memories in my pocket. My weary soul is broken and I don’t know where I’m going but I feel that wandering might be my healing. I’m sorry if I’m leaving us behind but I no longer have the common sense to hold me back. I have suffered more than I can endure and now is the time that I must find out who I am and where I’m supposed to be. I don’t have the strength or the faith that you’ve got to keep swimming against the river. I’m sorry for this goodbye and maybe someday we’ll meet again but not today. I love you.

© 2008 Cordell J. Larkin

I am nearing the flashpoint in the extremity of life and I am tired of stumbling along with unsteadiness. My emotions may get the best of me and I may succumb to the emptiness that beguiles me. I am forever lost to the wind as my ashes are carried upon the currents. At least we were together for a while sharing moments hand in hand. Hold on to the memories for a time then bury them as you say goodbye. Well, at least we tried.

© 2008 Cordell J. Larkin

After all the time, after all the suffering; breath is heavy as unsteady hands gently fumble with the latch to Pandora’s Box. There’s an itchy finger on the trigger and a schizophrenic figure lurking in the shadows awaiting an inferno of light to saturate the ordinary. The ghost in the closet is haunting a glorious mind and the fickle flame is being deprived of oxygen. The unreachable has been placed upon a dusty shelf and nothing much is lifting skyward. Gravity is a barrier unbroken and the difficult words lay dormant, unspoken.

© 2008 Cordell J. Larkin

Beyond, on the other side of the blue veil, a vastness of a black velvet ocean filled with paper lanterns set adrift. Each trembling light, an ember of hope, peace, and love and even though they may be distant from shore they remain a constant vessel for dreams and memories. On rare occasion, a special moment of heart is witness to the extraordinary. Like a smooth flat stone, a wish with tears is skipped across a glorious atmosphere and without ripples it settles peacefully on the horizon. Sinking into the depths of the absolutely amazing and treasured for all eternity. And at that moment thoughts flood with the idea that heaven must be just like this.

© 2008 Cordell J. Larkin

Overwrought and weary from a mental state of atmospheric consciousness; overcome by an overwhelming numbness of absolute vulnerability, the weight of the world is crashing down hard all around. Peace in the valley is nonexistent, decided unanimously by the coefficient of history. An unbridled storm of passion sandblasts its way into every crevice of thought devouring every cell like cancer. The velocity of mind is incapable of decelerating and fear clutches every fiber of being suffocating all rationale. From one comes two and equally opposite disappointing, shameful parallels. Borders and fences, the deep dark trenches, and with nothing left to spare until the last breath is exhaled, all is expired. The ground beneath feet, the heart beneath dirt, what an empire, this earth, tolerated by an existence that few find peaceful.

© 2008 Cordell J. Larkin

You cannot escape the years that define you as they are the moments that weave the very fabric of your life. Although any moment could be your last and this journey difficult you must face the challenging wind. It’s what makes you stronger. Don’t hold your breath any longer. Breathe. Take in everything that is around you. Beauty will manifest itself and the light will surround you preserving your eternity. Hands were made to build not destroy. Now, use them to shape the future.

© 2008 Cordell J. Larkin

Upon rooftops beneath a shelter of sky becoming self-absorbed by apathy you wish for disappearing. It’s all so obvious but you’re oblivious and numbed by the years that the laughter has escaped you. No more smiles, no more tears, but an ember burns waiting to ignite your heart into a delicate flame. But as delicate as you may be you still tiptoe across the coals hoping to reach the other side. And you may ask yourself why determined for answers you already know but unwilling to accept. Release yourself and suffer no longer. The only one stopping you is you.

© 2008 Cordell J. Larkin

Thou Gracious God, Whose Mercy Lends

Thou gracious God, Whose mercy lends
The light of home, the smile of friends,
Our gathered flock Thine arms enfold,
As in the peaceful days of old.

Wilt Thou not hear us while we raise,
In sweet accord of solemn praise,
The voices that have mingled long
In joyous flow of mirth and song?

For all the blessing life has brought,
For all the sorrowing hours have taught,
For all we mourn, for all we keep,
The hands we clasp, the loved that sleep.

The noontide sunshine of the past
These brief, bright moments fading fast,
The stars that gild our dark’ning years,
The twilight ray from holier spheres.

We thank Thee Father; let Thy grace
Our loving circle still embrace,
Thy mercies shed its heav’nly store,
Thy peace be with us ever more. Amen.

Oliver Wendell Holmes